Monday, April 7, 2008

Don't Turn Me In

I'm harboring a serial killer. Without mercy, he hunts down the innocent and brutally slaughters his victims. Something about this time of year brings out his viciousness. It doesn't seem like a spring day goes by without one of his murdered trophies laying about for my husband to quickly clean up to try to hide the bloodshed from the neighbors. A severed head here. A pile of innards there. It's gruesome.

We're trapped. If we try to escape, he'll turn on us. He pushed his own brother into a fish aquarium, shattering it into thousands of tiny pieces, so what might the killer do to my husband and I? He has already slashed the screens in our windows, destroyed the paint on our car, and had the audacity to relieve himself in our home as if threatening us in some sickening way to take action against his reign of terror.

Meet Pancake the cat...

Mass murderer of mice. Killer of rabbits.

Enemy to the small, furry, and feathered.

Family Pet.

5 comments:

Motherhood for Dummies said...

ohhhh so sorry to hear. Well my friend had that problem, but when her cat brough the bird into their house...the bird wasn't completly dead. So it got away and start flying and fluttering everywhere. My friend woke up and found little blood spots on the cieling and walls and a half eatten bird by her cat. I felt bad, she freaked out.

Steve & Amy said...

Too funny! My childhood cat used to bring snakes in the house....She looked like pancake....I hope pancake doesn't move to reptiles:)

Not Your Regular Mini Van Mom said...

LOL that was really funny. Harboring a criminal...hmm hope no one turns you in LOl

wolfqueen2 said...

Your screaming secret is safe with me. Having owned various cats, dogs, snakes, and turtles, I completely understand.Our cat use to bring something home every day just about the time I was starting to cook supper. Not sure if she was trying to tell me something or just providing more meat for the poot. LOL

wolfqueen2 said...

Hi MITW hven't seen you posting latelt. Is everything ok?