Monday, October 19, 2009

A New Nephew

Hi! I'm Tanner, Jenelle's newest nephew. I was born around five this morning IN A CAR!!! For real! I'm so speedy, my mommy didn't have a chance to make the five or so miles to the hospital. Mommy and Daddy only made it a few miles from our house when they had to pull over. I was born within seconds after they stopped with the cold wind blowing in my face. It was quite a shock!

What is even more of a shock is that this is not the first time my mommy couldn't make it to the hospital! How many woman do you know that haven't made it to the hospital to have their babies? Not many, right? My mommy has had two of her four babies in places other than a hospital room! I was born in a car, and my older brother, Tristan, was born in the bathroom!!!! My mommy has babies faster than anyone I know! She should be in the Guinness Book of World Records for fastest deliveries. This is my brother Tristan, the bathroom baby, holding me. We're going to be track stars someday.

Here's my mommy, Jessica, a.k.a. The Amazing Slippery Vagina Woman. She doesn't look like she just had a baby in a car does she? This woman is made to have babies. She doesn't get morning sickness, she only looks 5 months pregnant when she's actually due any day, and she pops out 8 pound babies in minutes without feeling any contractions until it's almost time for the baby to come.

Check this out--I'm not sure what I've signed up for--I have two older brothers and one older sister! They better help Mommy take care of me.

My brother, Justin, sure thinks I'm sweet. He doesn't realize that he's not the baby anymore. Heh, heh, heh.

This world sure is noisy! I am only a few hours old, and I have already gotten a taste of what life is going to be like at my house. My brothers were running all over the hospital like nuts playing with some balloons.
I'm not sure what my crazy cousin Colter was up to--why was he crawling all over the floor?


He only let his mommy, Jenelle, my favorite aunt, hold me for a few minutes. Then he started whining and said, "Put that baby down, Mommy!" Darn it. I wanted her to keep holding me. She was nice.
At least my sister, Alexis, got to hold me then. She's pretty nice too.


What a day! I need a nap.

2 comments:

Unknown said...

Congrats! Once again a wonderful story that only Jenelle could write!

Rachel said...

He sure is a cutie - and I love your story (although it cracks me up that you really used the V word hehehe wonder what kind of hits you'll get from that when people are searching :)

Ok - can't really believe I left that comment, don't mind me - blame it on the three pieces of halloween candy I just ate